CHANGE IS PAINFUL

 

Change is painful, even when it is ‘good change’ (by our personal ego-centric take on life) …. Perhaps a major component of this pain is FEAR.  So much time is wasted (by me … and maybe by you) in painful fear.  Even when I want the change, actually taking the physical leap and the leap of faith, FEAR often pops up BIG TIME and HUGE.

It is often only when the pain of not making the change outweighs the fear of making the change that we flip over into the action needed to create the new space in our lives. 

This does not mean that every change we consider needs to actually be seriously entertained.  To discern and ponder and then choose with consideration to the effect this choice has on self, family, friends and all of life (we are all connected) is a component of big life changes if wisdom and intuition predominate.  However, in considering all aspects the mitigating factor is not whether self and others LIKE (oh my, I am thinking about ‘liking’ a Facebook comment) but what is the outcome of the change being considered.  A simplistic example might be:  I choose to start an exercise regime.  Short term this is painful (muscles screaming) but looking to the future the long term benefits of increased endurance and perhaps longer more active life. 

PAIN IS UNAVOIDABLE.  After a lifetime of seeking to avoid pain this one over recent years is more completely coming to understand and feel in the core:  not only is pain unavoidable it is not always a bad thing.  Pain sends up the flag notifying us that something needs attention. 

So, on a more mundane level, I think I will break out my yoga mat and do some stretches now as I am thinking about changing my sedentary life to one of conscious movement to limber my mind, heart and body.  (Maybe not so mundane after all).

 

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Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self. Therefore, trust the physician and drink his remedy in silence and tranquility." - Khalil Gibran

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HOUSE-LESS

House sold. 40,000 under mortgage was the offer. Bank accepted in 14 days. I was told the banks often takes a year or two to accept an offer. i will be homeless before the end of May 2010. No plans on where to go or where to live. It does not bode well for the economy that the bank agreed without a fight. Perhaps this one being with little to no income and high overhead had something to do with their choice.

Almost in freefall.

I have no regrets for the choices i have made. i have followed my heart and looked to have good intention along the way.

A Taurus without firm ground underfoot - now that is an unusual bull. I hear the ground rumbling with the running hooves of my brothers and sisters. I also hear the ground rumbling with earthquakes, hurricanes and tornados. Perhaps there are others who sense, feel, see and know: the time for change is here.

For this one it is Yumni - the little whirlwind - dancing and playing as though the coming change were just a little thing. Asking me to come and play with destruction and creation.

Will i survive the change? "Do not ask such foolish questions", Yumni tells me.

DANCE WITH ME